7 tips on how not to end up penniless & hating the Bride…
August 5, 2018
Hey! you've been chosen as a Bridesmaid and you're not happy?
Hmm...What's the big deal, you wear a dress that you will probably hate and have to carry a bunch of flowers for a day, what’s difficult about that?
It's an honour, your best friend has chosen you. You now feel really guilty about not being over the moon.
Things have changed radically recently, with Brides being influenced from the good ol’ USA, it’s now fairly normal to have 10 or more Maids to accompany the Bride.
Bridesmaids are expected to contribute to a seemingly large amount of the wedding which for some can cause stress and anxiety. One bride recently asked her bridesmaids to fund the whole honeymoon and contribute to money for her to spend!
Top tip Number 1.
Open a savings account especially for the wedding, put away a little each month so you are not embarrassed or uncomfortable about contributing to items you didn’t even know existed!
One bridesmaid confided to me she had been asked by four different friends to be a maid this year and was saving hard. She had four Bridal showers to arrange and pay for, and four dresses to buy. One bride was insisting that they all go to Ibiza for the week.
Top tip Number 2.
As soon as the wedding is announced, and you have been asked to be a Bridesmaid, offer to do something for the Bride straight away.
It could be organising a day to a spa, or just getting the other bridesmaids together to discuss plans. She will love you for this.
Top tip Number 3.
Deal with the Dress. You know this is going to be something you will probably have to buy and probably dislike.
It’s for one day, people will not judge you, they know it’s the Brides choice…:)
Top tip Number 4.
Forge friendships with the other bridesmaids.
Anyone who has watched “Say Yes to the Dress” will realise that juggling friendships between 10-12 bridesmaids can be very stressful for the Bride, even catastrophic in some cases!
Bridesmaid Wars can break out at any moment.
Create friendships, be the better person. So, you haven’t been chosen as Maid of Honour, it’s not the end of the world. Put yourself in the Brides’ shoes it is impossible to choose between friends...
Top tip Number 5.
If you have been asked to pay for your own hairstyling and makeup on the day and are struggling to find funds, check out local college student rates for hair and makeup, its often-half price.
Top tip Number 6.
Deflect questions from the Bride. It can be overwhelming. Ask if she would like you to deal with wedding suppliers for a while. Having one or two people helping you like this can be really supportive.
Finally, Top tip Number 7.
Rather than asking a million questions yourself – DIY.
You can get your dress altered, you don’t need to ask permission for everything.
It’s easy to see how pre- wedding nerves can escalate into one big sad mess.
There have been some recent cases on the Internet, of Brides who have been super controlling over every tiny little detail.
One bride demanded that each bridesmaid send her reports of calories they had consumed that week, worried that they wouldn't fit into their dresses.
Another put the “job” of bridesmaid on an auction site and her friends were asked to bid for a place!
Another demanded that all her 12 bridesmaids dyed their hair brunette, as she wanted her blonde locks to stand out.
Friendships have been lost, due to stress before weddings, to be a perfect bridesmaid, or even just a good friend, help and support when and where you can.
Happy Weddings everyone!
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